Then Saturday Comes… the half decent football blog


Fabulous puns, managerial guns and internet funssh

That Tinchy Schryder talks a bit too much about monogomy doesn’t he?  Almost makes you wonder if he’s hiding something.

GUNN FIRED.

Bryan Gunn fired

Our purpose in Norwich is to prevent the success of aggression. It is not conquest, it is not empire, it is not foreign bases, it is not domination. It is, simply put, just to prevent the forceful conquest of Norwich by League One.”


One game into the season and we already have our first managerial casualty!

Punmakers everywhere were delighted when classic 1990s goalkeeper Bryan Gunn got fired from a job he was begged to take.  Gunn stepped into a job nobody wanted to try to fight off an inevitable relagation from the Championship.

Sadly, life in League One didn’t start well for old Bryan.  A 7-1 home defeat to East Anglian rivals Colchester meant that Delia had to reach for her pistol and give Gunn his marching orders.

Regular listeners will be all too aware that Bryan first got the job because his daughter set up a Facebook group.  It may not have gone as well as she hoped, but surely Ms Gunn now has a glittering career in headhunting.  Snap her up, Foxtons.

The one real regret with the whole episode is that it could so easily have happened to Alan ‘Big Al’ Shearer.  He and Gunn were both given caretaker jobs at crisis clubs due to the inexplicable belief that past on-pitch ability is a fine substitute for competent managerial competency.

Sadly, while Norwich continued with Big Bri, Big Al was not offered the chance to fully expose his inadequacy.  Newcastle may not have lost 7-1 at West Brom had Shearer been in the dug out, but it would have been close.

Soon enough he’ll be back in the dug out though.  And from what I saw of him last year, he won’t last much longer than the Darth Vader lookalike at Carrow Road.

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Some people really shouldn't use Twitter...

Some people really shouldn't use Twitter...

MUTLIMEDIA MULTIMORONS

For the lazy journalist there is no better invention than Twitter.

The public relations teams who censor celebrities’ public outbursts to no more than monosyllabic grunts must be pulling their hair out at the invention which essentially exposes the ‘stars’ as being morons.

Jordan/Katie Price has been doing this to good effect in the showbiz world, and now it’s creeping in nicely to football.

Most famously we have had the whole Darren Bent affair.  The (ex?) England striker was obviously trying to endear himself to the Spurs fans who had financed his £40,000 week wages while updating his page to show how hard it would be for him to leave White Hart Lane.

In case you missed it, here are some of his more interesting tweets;


“Seriously getting p***** off now”

“Why can’t anything be simple. It’s so frustrating hanging round doing jack s***.”

“Do I wanna go Hull City NO. Do I wanna go stoke NO do I wanna go sunderland YES so stop f****** around levy [sic].”


Fabulous stuff.

Still, it seems that Darren was not Tottenham’s only Tweeter.  Apparently ‘appy ‘arry ‘imself has got an account!  I must stress that it may be a fake, but according to the trustworthy F365 forum it’s real.

http://twitter.com/harrysblog


I’m 100% sure it’s a fake, as it reads too much like Redknapp barks.  Still, it’s worth a gander if just for such musings as “I’ve promised to call Sandra before heading for the gate. Gate 18 is it Bondie?” and the sublime “What should I have for breakfast; Dim Sum or Egg-fried noodles?”.

Lets just agree to pretend that it’s real.

Still, one football ‘personality’ who has been writing very real social networking updates is Leicester City (reserve) striker Ricky Sappleton.  Sapps came in with a big reputation as a young player with bags of potential hidden under bags of personal baggage.  Bagdhad.

Anyway, his career at the Walkers Bowl hasn’t taken off in the slightest.  Although he has probably been paid handsomely, he hasn’t done anything on the pitch and has been ferried out on loan to Bournemouth, Oxford and Telford.

It’s not going well for the fella.

Poor old Sapps

Poor old Sapps

Anyway, here’s some of the thoughts he’s been posting on his Facebook status recently…


Ricky I WISH I WAS 16 AGAIN SO I COULD CHANGE SOME OF THE DECISION I MADE ESPECIALLY THE BAD FOOTBALL 1’S I MADE

Ricky: dis place is killing my career bloody hell fam


And finally, here’s an astute conversation between our future number 9 and his pal;


Joe Weston: LOL so just joining Leicester was a bad football decision?

Ricky: take a wild guest


The letters are consistent to Mr Sapps’ original spelling.  I’d love to take a wild guest to his house, seeing as I paid for it with my season ticket money that paid for his wages to sit around and not have to do anything ever with his life, especially when out on loan and struggling to get into the Telford team.

Don’t blame Nigel for your own shortcomings, Sappsy!

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Me channeling my psychic powers

Channeling my psychic powers

BIG KICK OFF BIG PREDICTIONS

So the Premiership kicks off this weekend.  My long-term theories for the season are Chelsea champs, Man City to replace Arsenal in the top four and Burnley, Portsmouth and Hull to get relegated.

However, come the end of the season I will of course claim that I had tipped Manchester United the whole way, and I could see Man City’s relegation coming a mile off.

For more accountable tips, here are some predictions for the weekend…

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BIG WINNERS:

  • Chelsea, Arsenal & Man U win comfortably (and Owen scores)
  • Stoke – thumping opening day win over Burnley
  • Hull fans – Chelsea will put the first nail in Phil Brown’s coffin, sacked by October

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BIG LOSERS:

  • Liverpool and Man City both suffer first day defeats
  • Fans at Bolton vs Sunderland (the most boring game ever?)

Incidentally, anyone doubting by psychic abilities can watch me perform some mind reading on the stage by clicking  here!!


2 Comments so far
Leave a comment

y’r really nice guz

Comment by asymnlale

A nice blog you’ve got here. You love to photoshop!!

Jimmy

http://www.lcfc.wordpress.com

Comment by jimmyireland7




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